I Weird If I Date Online?
by Devlyn Steele
like to share with us your own article about online dating,
you can submit them here at our Love
Am I Weird
If I Date Online?
A few years back I was working with a client who had recently moved
to Los Angeles. She was single, did not know many people in the
big city, and felt a little lonely. I innocently suggested she give
online dating a shot. It seemed like an easy and pressure-free way
to meet people, and I had other clients who enjoyed their experience
and were in good relationships as a result.
"What kind of
desperate person do you think I am?!?" she snapped.
but explained that she felt “weird” about online dating. This perked
my curiosity, so later I asked some of my other clients if they
ever tried it. Some only confessed after their faces turned three
shades of crimson. Since I am a strong proponent of online dating,
I dispel any stigma or embarrassment when I recommend it to my clients.
This is what I tell them:
For many singles,
life moves like Richard Petty around the Talladega Speedway. We
change jobs every few years. We relocate more frequently. We cannot
remember the last time we answered a phone with a cord. Even if
time is not the issue, some single people cannot shake the feeling
that everyone else is happy while they are always alone. We may
look at online dating as an act of desperation, because “normal
people don’t need something like that.”
The simple fact
is that you are not weird if you use an online dating service. We
only feel weird when we think we are doing something outside the
norm. Consider this: over 40 million people in the US access online
dating websites every month. It is the fastest growing sector of
online content. There is no reason to feel embarrassed, because
if you date online you are actually part of a huge group.
There is nothing
wrong with wanting to find someone special, or at the very least
make some new friends, so why not use every resource available to
you? You do not get extra points for meeting someone in a bar or
while waiting for dry socks at the Laundromat. Does it matter to
you how you met the important people already in your life? You probably
barely even think about it.
By setting up
a personal profile and a list of likes and dislikes, you invest
time in yourself. More importantly, you are taking action by trying
to improve yourself and your situation. You are putting yourself
out there and taking control by refusing to be lonely and isolated.
I have found
many advantages to the Internet. The anonymity of online dating
allows you to roll out of bed, hair standing in ten different directions,
breath smelling like Boston Harbor at low tide – then click! You
stumble on a person you will be dating in a few weeks. The cost
compared to going out and searching is next to nothing. You can
learn more about a person’s interests to see if they mesh with yours.
You do not have to deal with the harshness of rejection in person.
You have a huge pool of people to explore (remember, 40 million!)
from all walks-of-life, people you would never have the chance to
meet within your neighborhood or small circle of friends.
There is also
fraud and deception. You will probably come across a photo that
looks eerily like Pamela Anderson – right down to the copyright
in the lower corner. Clients tell me about married people posing
as single. Nevertheless, these issues of honesty exist both on and
off-line, so do not let that stop you from finding the partner you
With 43% of
the U.S. population being single and with so many single clients
asking me about Internet dating, I began to put a guide together
to help my clients use this service effectively and safely and avoid
these pitfalls. I want everyone to find the happiness they deserve
and want to make this Tool book available to everyone for Free!
To get your free E-Book, “Tools To Internet Dating” go to TheRelationshipTools.com
and get your copy today.
Don’t be ashamed
or afraid, learn the best and safest way to use the Internet to
take control of your life and find the person you deserve!
Steele ("America's Leading Life-Coach") has been a public consultant
and a private counselor for over 15 years. A Cognitive Therapist,
Radio host and Columnist, Devlyn also developed ToolsToLife.com.
Devlyn maintains a thriving practice in Hollywood, where he counsels
famous actors, musicians and captains of industry. Soon his new
book will be available, Relationship Tools. You can hear Coach Steele
live every Tuesday on LoveBeat Radio 1310 KXAM.com 7-9 PM. Arizona
Time. You can email him at: firstname.lastname@example.org
little journal of love is now available for your free download.
Back to Online
Dating Page <<